| What do you want to do? I don't know, what do | | | | Great we can minimize problems of what and |
| you want to do? Sound familiar? I know that I | | | | where to eat now - that means less stress. |
| personally have said it and heard it more times | | | | Now, I suggest you do the same thing with things |
| than I can count. What's more is that people | | | | that you would like to do. Let's take a family for |
| come to my office and have the same issue - | | | | example. The family consists of two adults and |
| and it can cause some serious problems to arise. | | | | three children ages 5, 7 and 9 years old. Again we |
| People can get resentful because they always do | | | | do a brainstorming session - emphasizing that |
| what the other one wants to do. It may be a | | | | there are no wrong or bad answers (and |
| problem because they never have anything to | | | | enforcing the no criticism rule!). You might get a |
| contribute when asked. It also may be that they | | | | list such as the following: |
| don't feel comfortable giving their opinion. Often | | | | Visit Beijing |
| they have given their input in the past and gotten | | | | Go to Disneyworld |
| shot down - so they have given up. I want to go | | | | Explore the drainage ditch or field next door |
| to Samurai Sushi. Oh I hate raw fish. But they | | | | Go fishing at the lake |
| have more than raw fish. | | | | Go to the park |
| So how can you avoid this problem? I have heard | | | | Feed the Geese |
| people who had three options when they asked | | | | Go roller skating |
| and the person got to choose from one of the | | | | Go bike riding |
| three that were already acceptable to the person | | | | Sail to Tahiti |
| who asked. Good idea but wouldn't it be better to | | | | Go to a movie |
| have lost of choices or have a way to make a | | | | Play tag |
| choice - just for fun? | | | | You get the idea - anything goes. Some of these |
| I suggest that you sit down with your family, | | | | could be done any day. Some are free. Some |
| friends, coworkers, whoever you have this issue | | | | would take planning and money. Sort them into |
| with. Then ask the question where are places that | | | | groups. On a Friday night you can go to the free |
| you like to eat? This is a brainstorming session so | | | | list and choose one at random. You could pick out |
| there are no bad answers. You write down | | | | several and vote. You can do it anyway you like |
| whatever is said. Okay so what if you only get | | | | but you will be building the cohesiveness of your |
| three places to choose from? Go to Google maps | | | | family if you let everyone participate in the choice. |
| and type in restaurants near your home town - | | | | Yes, you may have to make a decision and |
| for me that would look like - "restaurants near | | | | sometimes there will be someone unhappy - but |
| Modesto, Ca". Or you could be more specific - | | | | you have made terrific progress. |
| Chinese restaurants near Modesto, CA. You then | | | | You can do this for vacations, weekends, |
| get a list, locations, and even directions if you | | | | afterschool activities, dates, nights on the town, |
| need them. | | | | there is really no end to how you can apply this. |
| That is great now we have a list then what? | | | | The bottom line is that you get out of your rut, |
| Next you sort them into categories - could be | | | | get to do new and fun things, and reduce your |
| fast food, sit down meals and special occasions. | | | | stress while building your relationships |
| Could be sorted by style of food. You also need | | | | That's it, plain and simple - not always easy |
| to review the list with the group - sometimes | | | | though. Let me know what you think, what |
| places get vetoed all together for a variety of | | | | questions that you have and perhaps in addition to |
| reasons - I once found a mouse (dead) on the | | | | answering you I will extend this article to make it |
| floor at my feet under my table at my favorite | | | | better. |
| restaurant - that might be a big turn-off for you. | | | | |